Now, I know that it's not really a big surprise that Ingrid and I don't see eye to eye on a lot of things. But the last visit she had with us was an interesting one. There were times that I thought, "This is going really well." and I momentarily forgot how she really is. But this little conversation/her point of view is still irritating me.
She was talking about all the things that she had to get done before they left for their trip to Spain. And the first thing she listed off was that she had to go to a funeral the next day. At first I was concerned because I didn't realize that somebody had died, and really, nobody likes funerals. And to me, I avoid them at all costs... and the only reason why I end up going to some of them is to show support. But this isn't like that at all. In fact, she didn't even know the guy. WHAT?! Are you serious? You want to attend somebody's funeral that you maybe were at the same event with? Turns out this guy was a pretty big deal in the masons (Mike, her husband is a mason). And because he was such a big deal it was going to be a pretty large event. In her words, "I'm excited to go because it's going to be a big show." First of all I don't think that there is anybody in their right mind who is excited to go to a funeral... and secondly, I just couldn't understand seeing it as a show. Somebody died. That somebody has people who genuinely care about them, and you want to go just so you can see a 'big show?'
I called her out on it. I asked her why she liked that and then she tried to tell me that she knew him because they where at a benefit dinner together or something. I just don't understand how she can't see what was wrong with the whole thing. and basically she did just want to get dressed up, be around a bunch of people, and see what type of funeral this big wig in the masons could have.
It's conversations like this, and so many more, that make me shake my head. That makes me realize that I would never leave my children alone with her. And how people can actually think like that. That its more important for appearances than being sincere. I'm not sure that I've ever had a sincere moment with her, which is awful. And the worst part is, I don't know if I ever will. I would love to have important conversations with her, but that's not what she's looking for when she visits. Gaetan and I talk about her a lot and how to handle these situations and it normally boils down to us trying not to be bitter and trying not to keep score. I guess we have these things in our lives to remind us of what we don't want. We pray for her, and I hope that God will change her life and that her eyes would be opened.
JVG
Family photo Oct 2010
Monday, April 2, 2012
Being thankful
The other day I was talking with Gaetan about how thankful I am that we aren't rolling in money. Sounds a bit strange right? I have seen so many of my peers get such great jobs right out of college that they buy houses, go on fun vacations, buy new cars, and really just don't worry about how to budget. Well, needless to say having two children very young with a husband in grad school doesn't produce such a life.
Instead, it produces something much better (in my opinion). Don't get me wrong, I look forward to the day when money isn't so tight, when I can give away a vast majority of our money for good causes, but for right now this is it. I wouldn't have it any other way.
A trend I see with my peers who have been so blessed at such a young age is that they don't learn certain life skills because they aren't required too. I was thinking back when we were both working, no kids and since we don't live that extravagent of a life we were comfortable. During that time I had no idea how to look for what was on sale ahead of time for our grocery list, you better believe that we never had our meals planned out for the whole week, and we ate out a lot more. Because we could. Ya know? But, I love that I can be more efficient with what we have. I love that I am a better cook because of it. These are skills that were learned because they had to be, and I'm not sure what I would've tapped into them if I didn't have to.
It also gives you a perspective of being grateful for everything. For instance, a few years ago we wouldn't have really thought twice about getting to go out to eat together because it wasn't that big of a deal. But now, it is such a treat when we get to go out to dinner together and have a date. That is partly because it's just us going out (thank you Mom and Dad for watching the kids!) but going out to eat is a treat. Or when Gaetan let me fly to Seattle and have a mini vacation. That was amazing. And yes, we did budget differently to make it work, but because we did it was that much better for me.
And the last thing, and really the most important, is having to rely on God. There are months (usually during the summer when teaching isn't as abundant) that we have to clearly rely on Him to provide. And I know that it's very easy to forget about the blessings He bestows when things are easy and plentiful. It helps remind us daily about what our priorities should be.
I know that there are so many more out there that have WAY less than we do, and I'm not saying that we don't have everything that we need. But I'm just saying that I am thankful for the little things.
JVG
Instead, it produces something much better (in my opinion). Don't get me wrong, I look forward to the day when money isn't so tight, when I can give away a vast majority of our money for good causes, but for right now this is it. I wouldn't have it any other way.
A trend I see with my peers who have been so blessed at such a young age is that they don't learn certain life skills because they aren't required too. I was thinking back when we were both working, no kids and since we don't live that extravagent of a life we were comfortable. During that time I had no idea how to look for what was on sale ahead of time for our grocery list, you better believe that we never had our meals planned out for the whole week, and we ate out a lot more. Because we could. Ya know? But, I love that I can be more efficient with what we have. I love that I am a better cook because of it. These are skills that were learned because they had to be, and I'm not sure what I would've tapped into them if I didn't have to.
It also gives you a perspective of being grateful for everything. For instance, a few years ago we wouldn't have really thought twice about getting to go out to eat together because it wasn't that big of a deal. But now, it is such a treat when we get to go out to dinner together and have a date. That is partly because it's just us going out (thank you Mom and Dad for watching the kids!) but going out to eat is a treat. Or when Gaetan let me fly to Seattle and have a mini vacation. That was amazing. And yes, we did budget differently to make it work, but because we did it was that much better for me.
And the last thing, and really the most important, is having to rely on God. There are months (usually during the summer when teaching isn't as abundant) that we have to clearly rely on Him to provide. And I know that it's very easy to forget about the blessings He bestows when things are easy and plentiful. It helps remind us daily about what our priorities should be.
I know that there are so many more out there that have WAY less than we do, and I'm not saying that we don't have everything that we need. But I'm just saying that I am thankful for the little things.
JVG
Carpe diem?
A few months ago I read this article written by a Momma... who is very clearly busy. At first the title was different than what you always here... It was entitled, "Don't carpe diem." I love how real she was about life with kids... how much you love them but there are days that you are counting down the minutes until Papa gets home. The article speaks for itself... I'll let you read it.
JVG
JVG
Every time I'm out with my kids -- this seems to happen:
An older woman stops us, puts her hand over her heart and says something like, "Oh, Enjoy every moment. This time goes by so fast."
Everywhere I go, someone is telling me to seize the moment, raise my awareness, be happy, enjoy everysecond, etc, etc, etc.
I know that this message is right and good. But, I have finally allowed myself to admit that it just doesn't work for me. It bugs me. This CARPE DIEM message makes me paranoid and panicky. Especially during this phase of my life - while I'm raising young kids. Being told, in a million different ways to CARPE DIEM makes me worry that if I'm not in a constant state of intense gratitude and ecstasy, I'm doing something wrong.
I think parenting young children (and old ones, I've heard) is a little like climbing Mount Everest. Brave, adventurous souls try it because they've heard there's magic in the climb. They try because they believe that finishing, or even attempting the climb are impressive accomplishments. They try because during the climb, if they allow themselves to pause and lift their eyes and minds from the pain and drudgery, the views are breathtaking. They try because even though it hurts and it's hard, there are moments that make it worth the hard. These moments are so intense and unique that many people who reach the top start planning, almost immediately, to climb again. Even though any climber will tell you that most of the climb is treacherous, exhausting, killer. That they literally cried most of the way up.
And so I think that if there were people stationed, say, every thirty feet along Mount Everest yelling to the climbers -- "ARE YOU ENJOYING YOURSELF!? IF NOT, YOU SHOULD BE! ONE DAY YOU'LL BE SORRY YOU DIDN'T!" TRUST US!! IT'LL BE OVER TOO SOON! CARPE DIEM!" -- those well-meaning, nostalgic cheerleaders might be physically thrown from the mountain.
Now. I'm not suggesting that the sweet old ladies who tell me to ENJOY MYSELF be thrown from a mountain. These are wonderful ladies. Monkees, probably. But last week, a woman approached me in the Target line and said the following: "Sugar, I hope you are enjoying this. I loved every single second of parenting my two girls. Every single moment. These days go by so fast."
At that particular moment, Amma had arranged one of the new bras I was buying on top of her sweater and was sucking a lollipop that she must have found on the ground. She also had three shop-lifted clip-on neon feathers stuck in her hair. She looked exactly like a contestant from Toddlers and Tiaras. I couldn't find Chase anywhere, and Tish was grabbing the pen on the credit card swiper thing WHILE the woman in front of me was trying to use it. And so I just looked at the woman, smiled and said, "Thank you. Yes. Me too. I am enjoying every single moment. Especially this one. Yes. Thank you."
At that particular moment, Amma had arranged one of the new bras I was buying on top of her sweater and was sucking a lollipop that she must have found on the ground. She also had three shop-lifted clip-on neon feathers stuck in her hair. She looked exactly like a contestant from Toddlers and Tiaras. I couldn't find Chase anywhere, and Tish was grabbing the pen on the credit card swiper thing WHILE the woman in front of me was trying to use it. And so I just looked at the woman, smiled and said, "Thank you. Yes. Me too. I am enjoying every single moment. Especially this one. Yes. Thank you."
That's not exactly what I wanted to say, though.
There was a famous writer who, when asked if he loved writing, replied, "No. but I love having written." What I wanted to say to this sweet woman was, "Are you sure? Are you sure you don't mean you love having parented?"
I love having written. And I love having parented. My favorite part of each day is when the kids are put to sleep (to bed) and Craig and I sink into the couch to watch some quality TV, like Celebrity Wife Swap, and congratulate each other on a job well done. Or a job done, at least.
Every time I write a post like this, I get emails suggesting that I'm being negative. I have received this particular message four or five times -- G, if you can't handle the three you have, why do you want a fourth?
That one always stings, and I don't think it's quite fair. Parenting is hard. Just like lots of important jobs are hard. Why is it that the second a mother admits that it's hard, people feel the need to suggest that maybe she's not doing it right? Or that she certainly shouldn't add more to her load. Maybe the fact that it's so hard means she IS doing it right...in her own way...and she happens to be honest.
That one always stings, and I don't think it's quite fair. Parenting is hard. Just like lots of important jobs are hard. Why is it that the second a mother admits that it's hard, people feel the need to suggest that maybe she's not doing it right? Or that she certainly shouldn't add more to her load. Maybe the fact that it's so hard means she IS doing it right...in her own way...and she happens to be honest.
Craig is a software salesman. It's a hard job in this economy. And he comes home each day and talks a little bit about how hard it is. And I don't ever feel the need to suggest that he's not doing it right, or that he's negative for noticing that it's hard, or that maybe he shouldn't even consider taking on more responsibility. And I doubt anybody comes by his office to make sure he's ENJOYING HIMSELF. I doubt his boss peeks in his office and says: "This career stuff...it goes by so fast...ARE YOU ENJOYING EVERY MOMENT IN THERE, CRAIG???? CARPE DIEM, CRAIG!"
My point is this. I used to worry that not only was I failing to do a good enough job at parenting, but that I wasn't enjoying it enough. Double failure. I felt guilty because I wasn't in parental ecstasy every hour of every day and I wasn't MAKING THE MOST OF EVERY MOMENT like the mamas in the parenting magazines seemed to be doing. I felt guilty because honestly, I was tired and cranky and ready for the day to be over quite often. And because I knew that one day, I'd wake up and the kids would be gone, and I'd be the old lady in the grocery store with my hand over my heart. Would I be able to say I enjoyed every moment? No.
My point is this. I used to worry that not only was I failing to do a good enough job at parenting, but that I wasn't enjoying it enough. Double failure. I felt guilty because I wasn't in parental ecstasy every hour of every day and I wasn't MAKING THE MOST OF EVERY MOMENT like the mamas in the parenting magazines seemed to be doing. I felt guilty because honestly, I was tired and cranky and ready for the day to be over quite often. And because I knew that one day, I'd wake up and the kids would be gone, and I'd be the old lady in the grocery store with my hand over my heart. Would I be able to say I enjoyed every moment? No.
But the fact remains that I will be that nostalgic lady. I just hope to be one with a clear memory. And here's what I hope to say to the younger mama gritting her teeth in line:
"It's helluva hard, isn't it? You're a good mom, I can tell. And I like your kids, especially that one peeing in the corner. She's my favorite. Carry on, warrior. Six hours till bedtime." And hopefully, every once in a while, I'll add -- "Let me pick up that grocery bill for ya, sister. Go put those kids in the van and pull on up -- I'll have them bring your groceries out."
Anyway. Clearly, Carpe Diem doesn't work for me. I can't even carpe fifteen minutes in a row, so a whole diem is out of the question.
Anyway. Clearly, Carpe Diem doesn't work for me. I can't even carpe fifteen minutes in a row, so a whole diem is out of the question.
Here's what does work for me:
There are two different types of time. Chronos time is what we live in. It's regular time, it's one minute at a time, it's staring down the clock till bedtime time, it's ten excruciating minutes in the Target line time, it's four screaming minutes in time out time, it's two hours till daddy gets home time. Chronos is the hard, slow passing time we parents often live in.
Then there's Kairos time. Kairos is God's time. It's time outside of time. It's metaphysical time. It's those magical moments in which time stands still. I have a few of those moments each day. And I cherish them.
Like when I actually stop what I'm doing and really look at Tish. I notice how perfectly smooth and brownish her skin is. I notice the perfect curves of her teeny elf mouth and her asianish brown eyes, and I breathe in her soft Tishy smell. In these moments, I see that her mouth is moving but I can't hear her because all I can think is -- This is the first time I've really seen Tish all day, and my God -- she is sobeautiful. Kairos.
Like when I'm stuck in chronos time in the grocery line and I'm haggard and annoyed and angry at the slow check-out clerk. And then I look at my cart and I'm transported out of chronos. And suddenly I notice the piles and piles of healthy food I'll feed my children to grow their bodies and minds and I remember that most of the world's mamas would kill for this opportunity. This chance to stand in a grocery line with enough money to pay. And I just stare at my cart. At the abundance. The bounty. Thank you, God. Kairos.
Or when I curl up in my cozy bed with Theo asleep at my feet and Craig asleep by my side and I listen to them both breathing. And for a moment, I think- how did a girl like me get so lucky? To go to bed each night surrounded by this breath, this love, this peace, this warmth? Kairos.
These kairos moments leave as fast as they come- but I mark them. I say the word kairos in my head each time I leave chronos. And at the end of the day, I don't remember exactly what my kairos moments were, but I remember I had them. And that makes the pain of the daily parenting climb worth it.
If I had a couple Kairos moments during the day, I call it a success.
Carpe a couple of Kairoses a day.
Good enough for me.
Saturday, March 31, 2012
My first half marathon
This past weekend was a lot of firsts. My first time being without my family. My first time running a half marathon. My first time to Seattle! It was a whirl wind weekend, but it was good and a lot of fun! It all started Friday.
Friday morning I had a ton of cooking to do. I figured if my husband was gracious enough to watch the kids for three days, by himself, then I should try to make it as easy as possible for him. That meant, Friday morning I was making meals and snacks for the next few days. I was lucky, and efficient, enough to get all my cooking done in about an hour and a half! That included, lentil soup, rice pudding, meatloaf cupcakes and various other snacks. :) I was feeling pretty good. Ingrid also came into town to celebrate Gaetan's birthday so we went out to eat and got some new clothes for the kids. Gaetan had to go to class so Ingrid stayed around and played with Tristan while Lucy took a nap. I was planning on getting everything packed for our overnight trip while she was there, but we were having a good time hanging out, being silly with Tristan, I figured it would wait.
Once Gaetan got home I had to pack our family for an overnight as fast as I could. We drove to the east side of the state to stay with some friends, because my flight was really super early Saturday morning. The kids stayed up way past their bedtime, because I knew that Lucy wasn't going to bed without a fight. Tristan pretty much just stayed up until we went to bed, which was about 11:30. It was nice having dinner with our friends again. Something I miss a lot... we used to do it several times a week together, and it's so relaxing and filled with lots of food... what could be better?
Lucy woke up at 2 for some milk and after that I was wide awake. Going through lots of things in my head, making sure everything was taken care of... then I got people up and ready around 4 so that we could get out of the door. My flight left at 6:15... but since I haven't flown in a really long time I didn't know how long it was going to get through security and all that. We made it there earlier than we expected, but it was a good thing because the security line was LONG. Everything was perfectly planned so that I could hit the bathroom, and get something for breakfast without rushing. I was going to relax a bit more once I was on the plane.
The flight to Denver and stuff was pretty bumpy. I didn't take my motion sickness medication because I'm still nursing and they suggest that you don't. That was a labor of love. I was sick sick sick. I was really happy that I didn't throw up, but I was pretty much sick for the rest of the weekend because of it. Oof. We did fly over some mountains, which I took some pictures for Tristan and he was SO EXCITED about it. Normally I sleep during my flights, but this time I didn't...
I landed in Seattle and it was so good to see my friends Amy and Brian. We had to stick around downtown to pick up our race packets, so we walked around and hit up some of the touristy things to see. It was nice just to get out and about and get some fresh air. We hit up the Crab Pot which was some place Amy had never gone, but wanted to try. It was good... but expensive. :) we found out that we actually had to go to Mercer Island to pick up our packets so that was a little bit of an adventure. It's a beautiful island, and the houses were pretty impressive! I figured it was going to make for nice scenery while we ran.
We just hung out for the rest of the night, which was nice. We got to bed at a decent hour for our early start the next morning! We woke up fairly early because we were going to take a couple of buses to Mercer Island, because we figured the traffic was going to be a hot mess. There was a little bit of a fiasco with the first bus option, but we made it there eventually :) It was funny how much Brian seemed like he wanted to use public transportation but Amy wanted to just drive. Turns out driving would've been just fine, but who would've known? Traffic on a normal day is hectic, at best, so we figured that an event like this would make it worse.
The weather was pretty chilly when we first got there, but before the race I convinced Amy that it would be a good idea to wear shorts. Personally, I hate being hot, so I would've much rather have been cold, which was not the case. Once we got running we were SO happy that we had shorts on.
I am happy to say that I beat my goal! I was just hoping to do it in less than 2 hours and 10 minutes (a ten minute/mile pace) but we did it in 2:04! :) That averaged out to be around 9:28... which is WAY faster than I ever run during training. It must've been the environment and being around other people. The island was beautiful... but really hilly. Around mile 7 the lady there said something about the 7 mile ascension... and she wasn't kidding. It was pretty much up hill until the biggest hill between 11 and 12. oof. Our first half of the race was about 57 minutes, which I was really happy with! We even had a few 8 minute miles in there... but the last half of the race plus the combination of the hills was intense.
I was happy to have been able to be out there and support Amy. :) It was a great experience to share together I thought. We spent the rest of the day just hanging out, rehydrating, resting and just recovering from our fun filled adventure. Later that night I was able to meet up with a good childhood friend. He was flying into Seattle late that night so we met up for a quick drink, because everybody had to still go to work early the next morning, and I had to get ready to fly back home.
The next morning another old family friend came over with her kids, and I got to give her my milk and see her kiddos. She was nice enough to bring me downtown so that I could meet up with Amy one last time for lunch and catch the light rail to the airport. That was the beginning of my travels home. I talked with a pharmacist and she said that I could have motion sickness meds if I 'pumped and dumped' for a day. I was relieved because I didn't want to be sick like that again! The flight into Denver was so bumpy that they never took the fasten seatbelt light off and there were several times that my bunda actually left my seat!
I flew into Detroit around midnight and then we had to drive home after that. It was so good to see my family again and be home. It was a great experience, and I'm looking forward to seeing them again. :)
JVG
Friday morning I had a ton of cooking to do. I figured if my husband was gracious enough to watch the kids for three days, by himself, then I should try to make it as easy as possible for him. That meant, Friday morning I was making meals and snacks for the next few days. I was lucky, and efficient, enough to get all my cooking done in about an hour and a half! That included, lentil soup, rice pudding, meatloaf cupcakes and various other snacks. :) I was feeling pretty good. Ingrid also came into town to celebrate Gaetan's birthday so we went out to eat and got some new clothes for the kids. Gaetan had to go to class so Ingrid stayed around and played with Tristan while Lucy took a nap. I was planning on getting everything packed for our overnight trip while she was there, but we were having a good time hanging out, being silly with Tristan, I figured it would wait.
Once Gaetan got home I had to pack our family for an overnight as fast as I could. We drove to the east side of the state to stay with some friends, because my flight was really super early Saturday morning. The kids stayed up way past their bedtime, because I knew that Lucy wasn't going to bed without a fight. Tristan pretty much just stayed up until we went to bed, which was about 11:30. It was nice having dinner with our friends again. Something I miss a lot... we used to do it several times a week together, and it's so relaxing and filled with lots of food... what could be better?
Lucy woke up at 2 for some milk and after that I was wide awake. Going through lots of things in my head, making sure everything was taken care of... then I got people up and ready around 4 so that we could get out of the door. My flight left at 6:15... but since I haven't flown in a really long time I didn't know how long it was going to get through security and all that. We made it there earlier than we expected, but it was a good thing because the security line was LONG. Everything was perfectly planned so that I could hit the bathroom, and get something for breakfast without rushing. I was going to relax a bit more once I was on the plane.
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| Chai... breakfast of champions. |
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| On my way to Denver |
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| I had made it on the plane! Adventures.... ready to go! |
The flight to Denver and stuff was pretty bumpy. I didn't take my motion sickness medication because I'm still nursing and they suggest that you don't. That was a labor of love. I was sick sick sick. I was really happy that I didn't throw up, but I was pretty much sick for the rest of the weekend because of it. Oof. We did fly over some mountains, which I took some pictures for Tristan and he was SO EXCITED about it. Normally I sleep during my flights, but this time I didn't...
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| On my way to Seattle! |
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| Mountains flying into Seattle |
I landed in Seattle and it was so good to see my friends Amy and Brian. We had to stick around downtown to pick up our race packets, so we walked around and hit up some of the touristy things to see. It was nice just to get out and about and get some fresh air. We hit up the Crab Pot which was some place Amy had never gone, but wanted to try. It was good... but expensive. :) we found out that we actually had to go to Mercer Island to pick up our packets so that was a little bit of an adventure. It's a beautiful island, and the houses were pretty impressive! I figured it was going to make for nice scenery while we ran.
 |
| More mountains for Duder |
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| Amy and Brian with some scenery |
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| Space needle with 'Angry Bird' |
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| In front of the musical fountain |
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| Lunch! |
We just hung out for the rest of the night, which was nice. We got to bed at a decent hour for our early start the next morning! We woke up fairly early because we were going to take a couple of buses to Mercer Island, because we figured the traffic was going to be a hot mess. There was a little bit of a fiasco with the first bus option, but we made it there eventually :) It was funny how much Brian seemed like he wanted to use public transportation but Amy wanted to just drive. Turns out driving would've been just fine, but who would've known? Traffic on a normal day is hectic, at best, so we figured that an event like this would make it worse.
The weather was pretty chilly when we first got there, but before the race I convinced Amy that it would be a good idea to wear shorts. Personally, I hate being hot, so I would've much rather have been cold, which was not the case. Once we got running we were SO happy that we had shorts on.
I am happy to say that I beat my goal! I was just hoping to do it in less than 2 hours and 10 minutes (a ten minute/mile pace) but we did it in 2:04! :) That averaged out to be around 9:28... which is WAY faster than I ever run during training. It must've been the environment and being around other people. The island was beautiful... but really hilly. Around mile 7 the lady there said something about the 7 mile ascension... and she wasn't kidding. It was pretty much up hill until the biggest hill between 11 and 12. oof. Our first half of the race was about 57 minutes, which I was really happy with! We even had a few 8 minute miles in there... but the last half of the race plus the combination of the hills was intense.
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| Happy we made it to the Island.. it was pretty cold (see blue lips!) |
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| Before the race |
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| After race, dry clothes... happy to be done! |
I was happy to have been able to be out there and support Amy. :) It was a great experience to share together I thought. We spent the rest of the day just hanging out, rehydrating, resting and just recovering from our fun filled adventure. Later that night I was able to meet up with a good childhood friend. He was flying into Seattle late that night so we met up for a quick drink, because everybody had to still go to work early the next morning, and I had to get ready to fly back home.
 |
| With Beaker at Pike's Brewery |
The next morning another old family friend came over with her kids, and I got to give her my milk and see her kiddos. She was nice enough to bring me downtown so that I could meet up with Amy one last time for lunch and catch the light rail to the airport. That was the beginning of my travels home. I talked with a pharmacist and she said that I could have motion sickness meds if I 'pumped and dumped' for a day. I was relieved because I didn't want to be sick like that again! The flight into Denver was so bumpy that they never took the fasten seatbelt light off and there were several times that my bunda actually left my seat!
I flew into Detroit around midnight and then we had to drive home after that. It was so good to see my family again and be home. It was a great experience, and I'm looking forward to seeing them again. :)
Friday, March 30, 2012
Up Dog
Tristan has such a funny personality for a 2.5 year old. He finds things funny and understands why they are so. The other day he told his first joke to a stranger. We were in line at the grocery store and he said, "Up dog" to the cashier. The cashier looked puzzled and said, "What's up dog?" Then Tristan just smiled and laughed. He's amazingly cute and funny. Good work dude.
JVG
JVG
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Catalyst
I can't believe that the weekend is already upon us... as I sit here I think of all the things that I have to get done before tomorrow night. This week has gone by so quickly... and really ever since I bought my tickets to Seattle it has. I thought that it wouldn't be fast enough, but now I can't believe that it's almost here.
Today was a really good day though. The kids slept in (Lucy got up at 8 with only getting up once last night and Duder slept in til about 930!). Then Gaetan was so gracious enough to get them ready for the day so that I could do my running outside, instead of on a treadmill later tonight. Let me tell you... running outside is SO MUCH better than running on a treadmill. Although, I have to admit for about the first 4 miles I really didn't want to be running at all... it was all mental. But, I met up with them at the library, and then actually ran home to shower and they met me there. We got to drop Papa off at work (and Duder always chimes in, "and school") and then I got the kids to myself :)
We just took an easy day. They had already played pretty hard at the library with Papa, and so after lunch we just played upstairs. Did a lot of reading, and they actually entertained each other. That meant I got to do a couple loads of laundry and fold some laundry. Before I knew it it was time to pick Papa up from school.
I got to go shopping quickly to get some needed items for Seattle this weekend and then we got home and had dinner. Played with the kids and got them to bed early. They both missed out on naps today so they were more than ready. That meant that we got to spend a lot of time together tonight. :) Its amazing what it can do for us (as a couple) to have that down time together. And because the kids got to bed so early we can get other productive things done after hanging out. :)
My spirits were high today and everything was just wonderful. Here's to the busiest weekend ever... probably. :) Will let you know how this weekend goes! Wish me luck!
JVG
Today was a really good day though. The kids slept in (Lucy got up at 8 with only getting up once last night and Duder slept in til about 930!). Then Gaetan was so gracious enough to get them ready for the day so that I could do my running outside, instead of on a treadmill later tonight. Let me tell you... running outside is SO MUCH better than running on a treadmill. Although, I have to admit for about the first 4 miles I really didn't want to be running at all... it was all mental. But, I met up with them at the library, and then actually ran home to shower and they met me there. We got to drop Papa off at work (and Duder always chimes in, "and school") and then I got the kids to myself :)
We just took an easy day. They had already played pretty hard at the library with Papa, and so after lunch we just played upstairs. Did a lot of reading, and they actually entertained each other. That meant I got to do a couple loads of laundry and fold some laundry. Before I knew it it was time to pick Papa up from school.
I got to go shopping quickly to get some needed items for Seattle this weekend and then we got home and had dinner. Played with the kids and got them to bed early. They both missed out on naps today so they were more than ready. That meant that we got to spend a lot of time together tonight. :) Its amazing what it can do for us (as a couple) to have that down time together. And because the kids got to bed so early we can get other productive things done after hanging out. :)
My spirits were high today and everything was just wonderful. Here's to the busiest weekend ever... probably. :) Will let you know how this weekend goes! Wish me luck!
JVG
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Hormones
WARNING: This may contain talk of which you might find unfavorable, so ye be warned!
Its been about 2 months now since I restarted having my period again. With Tristan I got it again after he was about 9 months and the same with Lucy. I guess it started when they started to eat more solid food and not as much nursing, even though she still does nurse a little bit. HOWEVER, I feel like my body doesn't know how to handle the hormones yet, or my hormones are out of whack.
I don't remember being a big ball of crazy when I would ovulate (you know, two weeks before you actually menstrate) but it's horrible now. It's like I have this out of body experience and can see that I'm being extra strength crazy and there isn't anything I can do about it. Sometimes I can feel it coming on, and I can stop it, for the most part, but other times it just flies. And I guess I would say that it's mostly directed towards Gaetan (poor man) and never the kids. And he and I have talked about it, so he knows whats going on, but it still isn't fair and it sucks.
I used to think that people would make excuses for their horrible attitudes, but hormones are a crazy thing. I worry sometimes that I'm going to be like this forever... which I just can't have. There is no excuse for it, and since I'm aware of it, I can try to focus more on not letting it happen, but its so strange that it does happen to me now. I have read/heard about woman who go through menopause and how they are sometimes crazy, and we actually had a family friend do that, so I know that it's not just an excuse that people use... which is scary too. Luckily for me I know that Gaetan keeps me in check, and wouldn't ever let it get to out of hand.
Another weird thing that happened since I started my cycle again is that I get sick everytime I'm about to menstrate. It's annoying. I feel like I'm sick all the time... and I'm not sure if its a combo of the kids being sick, me running a ton, and my body not being used to the hormones, but its crazy! I'm hoping that my body figures it out quick so I don't have to go through crazy sick girl once a month for a long time.
JVG
Its been about 2 months now since I restarted having my period again. With Tristan I got it again after he was about 9 months and the same with Lucy. I guess it started when they started to eat more solid food and not as much nursing, even though she still does nurse a little bit. HOWEVER, I feel like my body doesn't know how to handle the hormones yet, or my hormones are out of whack.
I don't remember being a big ball of crazy when I would ovulate (you know, two weeks before you actually menstrate) but it's horrible now. It's like I have this out of body experience and can see that I'm being extra strength crazy and there isn't anything I can do about it. Sometimes I can feel it coming on, and I can stop it, for the most part, but other times it just flies. And I guess I would say that it's mostly directed towards Gaetan (poor man) and never the kids. And he and I have talked about it, so he knows whats going on, but it still isn't fair and it sucks.
I used to think that people would make excuses for their horrible attitudes, but hormones are a crazy thing. I worry sometimes that I'm going to be like this forever... which I just can't have. There is no excuse for it, and since I'm aware of it, I can try to focus more on not letting it happen, but its so strange that it does happen to me now. I have read/heard about woman who go through menopause and how they are sometimes crazy, and we actually had a family friend do that, so I know that it's not just an excuse that people use... which is scary too. Luckily for me I know that Gaetan keeps me in check, and wouldn't ever let it get to out of hand.
Another weird thing that happened since I started my cycle again is that I get sick everytime I'm about to menstrate. It's annoying. I feel like I'm sick all the time... and I'm not sure if its a combo of the kids being sick, me running a ton, and my body not being used to the hormones, but its crazy! I'm hoping that my body figures it out quick so I don't have to go through crazy sick girl once a month for a long time.
JVG
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