Broccoli and Bubbles

Our little Lucy never ceases to amaze and surprise us.  The last time we were at Grandma and Don's for pizza and beer night, Lucy REALLY wanted to eat some broccoli... not something typical for a 15 month old I would imagine... but we gave it to her and she went to TOWN on it.  She LOVED it.  We joked that she really must be Grandpa's girl.

She ate the entire tree part off it!

Being a big girl drinker too

Then, after we ate, we went outside, like normal.  But to try to get Lucy to stay in one place my Mom got out some bubbles.  I mean, both kids love bubbles, but this time they were both really into blowing them themselves.  Again, I was really impressed that Lucy was blowing them herself!  Most kids don't understand the concept of blowing out and not sucking back in right away, but she was a bubble blowing champ!  :)

My parents garden

Dude picking beans

Bubbles got moved into the backyard

JVG

Bachelorette Party

Angela had a small get together for her bachelorette party.  The plan was to meet up at Melting Pot for dessert and then hang out at Lynsey's house (her best friend) afterwards.  Well, it was going to see how the night was going to see if I was going to hang out with them afterwards.  And if a certain somebody wasn't there then I might've considered it, but this one individual was SO ANNOYING I had to order a drink just to make the rest of the night tolerable.

The melting pot was delicious of course.  We had the yin-yang chocolate, dark chocolate with bailey's and chocolate with peanut butter.  And this girl who was intolerable had been to the Melting Pot apparently a ton of times and was trying to take control of everything... and that's fine if you actually know what you're talking about.  Ugh.

Here's the thing that gets me.  She has to be the center of attention, and this night is NOT about her!  It's about the bride to be.  And she got her some bridal undies that she SWORE she was going to convince her to wear on her wedding day (because that's so important right?)  I just told Angie not to wear any (well, because I was trying to just piss the other girl off, and it's not REALLY that bad of an idea right?  haha).  Then, while we were eating she was talking (very loudly) might I had about her IBS and how she can't have anything remotely gluten come near her.  So, she had the server make her a special plate with only gluten free things and anything that had gluten in them, we couldn't dip in the fondue because it might contaminate it... what?  Are you serious?  And, it's a fondue pot, you're supposed to dip shit in there!

My favorite thing of the whole night was when she was SO happy that they had skinny girl drinks because she went to the Biggest Loser Resort and had lost some weight.  This is what I don't understand... you're going to sit there and hork down a bunch of chocolate and sweets and you're worried about a few more calories in the cocktails you're going to have?  OK...

I was happy when the night was over and I didn't have to listen to her talk about herself.  It was unfortunate it went down that way because it would've been a nice little dessert outting with some high school friends otherwise.

JVG

Dude's fractured foot

Last Wednesday Lucy had a regular check up and Dude had been limping for a few days, so we thought that we could get him into the tail end of her appointment.  We love Dr. Chamberlain and he's so laid back about stuff... but we did call ahead to make sure that it was OK that we did bring Tristan in too.  Our dear Lucy at her 15 month check up is 26 lbs and 31 inches tall.  She is most definitely in the upper percentile for her age, but she is healthy and happy, so that makes us the same.  :)

Well, Dr. Chamberlain had Tristan walk around and he saw that he was limping too.  I thought I had narrowed it down to the area that was sore, but Dude kept telling me that nothing hurt.  Because there wasn't any swelling or bruising and he wasn't complaining about anything at all, Dr Chamberlain just thought it was maybe a sprain.  Most likely a bruise or something.  We told him that he was jumping off the bottom stair (like he always does) but this time he rolled when he landed.  We asked him if he hurt himself and he just got up, laughed and kept on playing.  This went on for a few days, but he just kept telling us nothing was wrong.

The kids played hide and seek for a little while, while we waited.

Lucy finished off the tater tots haha

Well, Dr. Chamberlain ordered and x-ray just to be sure, and there it was.. buckle fracture.  And I was pretty proud of myself because it was where I thought he had hurt himself.  Momma detective work.  ;) Well, we had been there since 2:45 (for the reg check up) and we were heading into 4:00 and Lucy was less than impressed about being confined to a small area.  We had at least packed some snacks so that entertained them for awhile, but we finally decided to take Lucy to my parents.  We didn't know how long we were going to be there, and it was a good idea that we did it.  We had been there almost an hour when Gaetan called saying they were finished.  She had screamed and screamed until we were less than .5 a mile from my parents and finally passed out... oh well.  She was much happier once at my parents.  :)

Grandma making everything better

Dude on the other hand took everything like a champ.  I didn't get to go back with him to the xray, and I was obviously with Lucy when he got casted, but from what I heard he was just super calm and really cooperative.  :)  That's my boy!  So, right now he's in a hard splint until we can meet with the orthopedic dr this week to see if he has to get a hard cast or if he is good to go.  He is running around like nothings on his foot at all!  And the day before we went to the Dr's he went on a two mile bike ride!  Our little brute.  :)

M and M ice cream always helps things too

Grandma and Grandpa bought him a new book

The kids had a long day... they were tired!

Dude all casted up and ready to go!

Goose snugging Yellow Monkey as she passed out in the car

JVG

Mr. and Mrs Jonathan Gigler

This past weekend was quite the wedding weekend for us!  It started on Thursday when I went to GR for a small bachelorette party (which I'll talk about later).  Then Friday I had rehearsal at the church during the early evening, and the wedding was in the morning, so we stayed the night at my parents house.

I have to admit, out of all the weddings I've been to I don't think I've ever been to one before noon.  I had to get there an hour early to run through the music one more time, but it all went off without a hitch!  The wedding was beautiful, and it was so the bride.

Announcing the new wife and husband!

It is always such a sentimental thing when you attend somebody's wedding that you've grown up.  I've literally known Angela since pre-school, and we've done orchestra things together ever since we started in the 4th grade.  It's amazing that we've kept in contact this long, and better yet, remained friends.  :)  So, it's such a joy to see her get married to what seems a very charming and nice young man.

The girls of my quintet KABAJ.  Been playing together since middle school

The reception was a lot of fun!  It was very quiet, and calm (just like the bride) and the table where we were seated was with a bunch of people I grew up with as well.  It could've gone poorly, but it went well, and it was fun to catch up with them all.  :)  There was a nice slideshow and it was fun to recognize and be apart of so much of it!  They even had square dancing... which didn't thrill me at first, but it was a lot of fun.  :)

Hanging out in the gardens at the reception

Me and the beautiful bride

My hottie husband. :)

So, here is to the beginning of their lives together!  They are actually moving to Alabama as soon as they get home from their honeymoon (because he got a job there) so it will be sad to have them so far away, but I know they will adapt well, and they have each other.

JVG

Protective Momma

WARNING: This post will contain some harsh adult language.

Last Saturday I was shaking because I was so angry.  As we all know Wilfreda=not my favorite person.  And ever since Zoe has been back in the picture it's been more and more apparent that I can't stand.  Saturday, I think was where I came to my realization of what drove me crazy about her.

She called Gaetan up in the morning FREAKING out about Zoe's housing in Seattle.  She was trying to fill out a student loan form for Zoe (because of course she's going to be paying for most of it) and she didn't know what to put down for if she was going to live on campus or not.  At the very beginning of the conversation I heard Gaetan tell her that we told Zoe that we knew people out there, and would help her if she didn't want to live on campus.  1.) Dorms suck, They're tiny and they're filled with freshman 2.) she would be paying WAY more for something tiny and they're going to be filled with freshman.  3.) They would make her have a meal plan and I can guarantee you that vegetarian/vegan options aren't going to be a plenty. 4.) They're going to be filled with freshman.  18 year olds that are on their own and going to be going crazy. Zoe is going to be 23 (or is, something like that) and I think that's going to drive her crazy.  Also, they could get her in trouble because they're underaged and she won't be...

So, we tried explaining all these things to her and Wilfreda just kept ignoring us (like she always does) and kept talking about how she's never done this before and doesn't know what to do.  Well, news flash lady, WE HAVE.  Both of us have.  We've both gone to college, moved away, and did just fine.  Hell, we even filled out our own paper work too.  And, not to downplay it, but we majored in SCIENCE, not fine arts... but of course that doesn't matter.  We still don't know anything.  Finally Gaetan was saying something and she told him that he had to be nice to her.  What?!  First, you're going to call us, then not listen, and then accuse us of being mean?  I don't think so.  I was seriously about ready to reach through that phone and wring her scrawny little neck.  Eventually we just told her to have Zoe call us if she really wanted help.

Really, the thing that pisses me off about this certain situation is the fact that Zoe is a grown ass woman.  She's been living her life just fine without this crazy woman and yet for some reason now that she's back she's reverting back to a child.  Zoe has moved all around, and has always made it work, I'm not sure why this is different.  And I'm not sure why she always run to Wilfreda when she thinks she needs help.  SHE WILL NOT HELP YOU.  SHE WILL ONLY MAKE IT WORSE.

Zoe and I had an interesting conversation about Wilfreda, and it's hard because when we talk Zoe seems to understand what type of person she is.  But then when she talks with her or visits she gets manipulated by her over and over again.  I talked with my good friend Amy about a lot of things that day and I think we got to the root of my issue with her.

I can't tolerate, or stand, when people's selfish decisions hurt others... especially when it comes to my family.  Wilfreda told Zoe that she was afraid that we were pulling away because Gaetan doesn't call as much anymore... which is true.  He doesn't.  He used to call more because I would ask him to, because I thought it was the nice thing to do.  Because for me, I want to talk with my mom and I know that we would have good conversation and she would give good advice when I needed it.  However, now I know more about Wilfreda and I would never make him call her.  Zoe tried to explain that she and I are polar opposites... that I'm pretty laid back and she's pretty high strung.  That the things that Wilfreda finds fun I don't.  Even by the way we demonstrate how we care for people is totally opposite and all Wilfreda could do was give snarky little pissy shit answers that 12 year olds would do.  She scoffed and said that we were alientating a lot of people by only hanging out with people like us and that she hoped our kids were laid back or else we wouldn't want to hang out with them.

First of all.  What. The. Fuck.  I don't know who she thinks she is saying that stuff about us.  My beef with her is her lack to understand what is appropriate and what isn't.  How she thinks that what she did as a "mother" (and I use the term loosely) is any where near acceptable.  Right now, I can't have my kids around her.  They are at the age where they are very vulnerable and the things that they learn now, see and hear will affectively shape who they are.  And if I can help it, I will not subject them to that crazy.  She thinks that she has a right to see them, that she's entitled because she's Oma.  Well, news flash. You don't.  Just because you had two children, (and I say had because she sure has hell didn't raise them.  And maybe leaving them alone is one of the better things she ever did for them) and because one of your kids had kids, doesn't make you have any sort of 'right.'

When ever she visits all she does is fawn over Lucy and tell her that she has to be a pretty girl and that when she gets older then Oma will buy her pretty things and jewelry.  Meanwhile completely ignoring Tristan.  I've seen what her 'affection' has done to Zoe.  I don't know how many times I've heard Wilfreda tell me that Lucy has to lose weight.  Are you fucking kidding me?  You want to tell me that my one year old daughter needs to lose weight because you think she's too fat?  Hate to break it to you, but that's called being healthy.  Zoe struggles with eating disorders, counting calories and always feeling inadequate.  Whenever she stays with Wilfreda she's always telling me how she gets her meals portioned out and can't have more if she wants.  RE FUCKING DICULOUS.  Not everybody can be skin and bones like you Wilfreda... and I can guarantee not everybody would want that.

I can't tolerate the way she makes it seems like what Gaetan does isn't spectacular at all.  She pretty much dismisses anything like everybody can do it.  But when it comes to Zoe, nobody could be doing the things that she is doing.  It's hurtful to watch her be that way and to think that it's OK.  I will not sit idly by while you systematically try to throw your bull shit on my family.  It's not OK.  And for whatever reason she won't listen to us.  She'll listen to Zoe so when Zoe presents these things to her she understands why they're wrong and semi half apologize to us for being bat shit crazy... but it's not good enough.

And the hardest thing for me is that she doesn't understand my motivation to want to protect my family. I don't think that you have to be a mother to understand that, but once you are a parent I would find it hard to believe that anybody would try to do otherwise.  She is a selfish selfish woman who has a life full of baggage that is pulling her down.  I know it will take time but for right now I'm doing what I need to do.

And this isn't just pointed at her.  If any one of my friends, or family members, or anybody we spend a considerable amount of time around would do this everytime, even though we've tried talking to them about it, they would be cut out too.  I wouldn't feel bad about it.  Not one bit.  And I don't feel bad about Wilfreda.  My kids and husband are WAY to important to me for this nonsense to happen.  And it would be a shame for them to grow up only knowing one set of their grandparents, but I am completely ready for that, should it play out that way.  Some may think it's cold hearted.  Some may think I'm being unreasonable.  And you know what I say to them?  Too fucking bad.

JVG

50 Shades...

All right, confession... I did read these books... all of them... in like 3 days.  It. Was. Ridiculous.  My good friend Amy sent the whole trilogy to me and I devoured them.  WARNING:  If you haven't read the books and plan on doing so I will be discussing plot and there may be some spoilers in there, just so you know.

Yes, they are salacious as hell, and make you all hot and bothered, but there is a really sad and serious side to the plot as well.  And I'm still not quite sure why these books are so addicting, or what makes Mr. Grey so hot, but, they are.  They are very quick reads, but beyond that I found myself really rooting for Christian.  Sure he has some weirdo tendencies (the SM part of BDSM isn't really something I could ever get into) but there were reasons for it.  Honestly, the second book was the hardest for me to read because it really dove into his childhood and why he was the way that he was... or thought he liked those types of things.  After I read the second one all I wanted to do was crawl into bed with Dude and snug with him all night long.

It's hard to read about child abuse and neglect... for anyone, not just parents.  But as a parent now it's almost unbearable.  I know I think about how I would feel if it was my kids, and realistically, it won't ever happen, but it still hurts.  I guess I liked how much he still cared for people, and wanted to protect them, even though nobody did that for him when he was little.  It's probably why he wants to do it with his family, or Ana... to give/provide them with that sense of security that he couldn't rely on.  It also made me realize that even though I don't have an indispensable income I would be doing the exact thing to ensure the protection of my family.  And because I could relate to him in that manner it's probably why I found myself hoping that he came out the other side... that he could overcome all those horrible things, be brave enough to dig down and come to grips with those issues and vulnerable enough to allow somebody in and help.  It probably doesn't hurt that he's oober successful and attractive... ;)

So, here's my book review.  Yes, there is a TON of sex in them, but I would still recommend them with all that was taken out.  I know that popularity wise, that's why they have been such a huge success, but there really is a serious underlying issue.  I'm not sure I would recommend them to my friends that are a bit more... prude-ish or easily embaressed, because truth be told there were some things in there that made even me blush.  I would definitely not read them in public because you might fall over, but if you can contain yourself go nuts!  I'm not sure I will read them anytime soon again, but I will probably end up reading them again in the future.

Not sure how I will feel if she chooses to right more books... I might give them a try!

JVG

Baby Ethan

This weekend we drove. A lot.  On Sunday we got to visit our good friends DJ and Hannah up in Ludington.  As I mentioned before, Hannah had a surprise solo home birth about two weeks ago, so we wanted to give them a chance to rest up and used to two small ones.  we didn't expect that we would be able to see them this quickly, but we were thrilled none the less.  I just think about when I was ready for visitors after my births and I can guarantee you I wouldn't do it two weeks after.

However, Hannah looks amazing.  Honestly, she doesn't even look like she had a baby!  She's skinny mcMini again, and her gorgeous self.  Ethan seems like a pretty chill baby.  He slept pretty much the entire time we were there... except for when he was eating or getting changed.  I was glad that we got to see them so soon because I remember how much I appreciated when people made us meals, so I was really happy to do that for them!  It's nothing real huge, but I know that not having to make a meal can make a big world of difference.

Lucy hanging out with Hannah

It was nice just visiting with them.  Seeing how they were adjusting with having two little ones.  Benjamin is about 22 months older than Ethan, which is pretty close in age!  I got to hear all about the birthing story from them myself... and it's still crazy even though I knew what happened!  It's really fun being able to hang out with them with the kids.  Tristan and Lucy were much warmer towards them this time (I think they remembered them from the last time we visited) and Benjamin was more about having me around too.  Lucy was pretty much attached to Hannah... it was pretty cute.  And after holding Ethan Lucy seems like a big old lunker!

Papa and the little man

While we were there they went little toad hunting, picked wild raspberries and played cars and chased each other outside.  I was surprised that the kids lasted as long as they did!

I did get to hold baby Ethan, and I can't imagine having a child that small!  Even when our kids were born they were still way bigger than Ethan!  And I got my baby fix in... the smell, the cooing, the works.  But it also helped me realize that I don't want to be pregnant anymore.  I still want kids, but I'm so happy with the age that the kids are now and the things that we can do together, having a small one would kinda put a kink in that.

The kids having their dessert

We didn't get home until real late again, and the kids were exhausted.  Lucy ended up taking a five hour nap today, and that was cut short because we woke her up.  I think she would've kept sleeping!  Same thing with Dude but he slept 3 hours.

We look forward to seeing them again, and they seem to be adjusting quite well.  :)

JVG

Education

Now that Lucy is a little older, able to sit for longer periods of time and is WAY interested in what Tristan is doing, helping Tristan with school stuff is getting much easier.  It's so interesting to see how much she wants to be doing everything he is, no matter what it is.  And, because of it, I think she is picking up a lot of things... she is way smart.

Goose, happily sitting and waiting at the table

The fun thing lately has been drawing... with markers, chalk, crayons, colored pencils... anything that will leave a colorful mark (hopefully on paper).  Our walls and the kitchen table have been christened with the love of a 1 year old, but it is just stuff right?  And she's gotten past the idea and fascination that she should want to eat the stuff instead of draw with it...

Lucy built this all by herself!  Very symmetric!  

Dude is loving all this learning.  He likes having somebody sit with him and color and draw, and of course, spell things.  He is still our boy who would sit and read books with you all day... so sweet.  The other day he wanted me to read a book but I was making dinner so I couldn't, so I started the first part of the book, and then I asked him what came next and I'm pretty sure he just busted out the rest of the book.  I was impressed.  He knows so much but doesn't lead on that he can read all these books to us if he wanted.  His favorite thing is to actually read to Lucy.  Adorable.

This has been encouraging as we are still deciding on whether we should home school or not.  I think, for right now it's still a-go.  And because of the things that he would be learning in a typical school setting I am most definitely able to teach him that here.  He gets a ton of social interaction already, and that is really the only part I was nervous about.  And so far, this summer, I've seen him take an interest in this so I think that's what we're going to do.  :)

Escuela de VG

JVG

Dude can write!

I am amazed constantly how quickly Tristan picks things up.  I think it's pretty impressive for a two year old to be able to read, and spell as well as he does!  But now he's added another thing to the list... he can write.

We've been working on writing a little bit this summer but nothing real serious.  His favorite thing to draw is an O, and then he got the hang of other letters quickly after.  During the morning he was really interested in how to write his name, so I wrote it out a few times and then had him trace over what I did.  He did fairly well, but didn't seem that interested in it after he'd done it.  I tried having him write it out without tracing it and he would get the T done and say, "Momma, you do it." After that, we just had fun, scribbling and coloring things.  He really likes connect the dot things too...

After nap time he wanted to draw some more so I set him up with his stuff and Lucy was still asleep so I was just hanging out next with him not really paying attention, and then he said, "Look Momma!"  And BAM there it was.  He wrote his name out, and I think he did a great job!  Momma is so proud of you little Dude!

Pleased with himself

JVG

East Side

Yesterday I got to drive out to the East Side and hang out with Ashley and Sunil :)  Gaetan was gracious enough to watch the kiddos solo while I went and had dinner with them and hung out.  :)  Even though I've been there before I got lost this time... ugh.  Stupid construction.  But, all is well and I finally made it.

We went to this Ethiopian restaurant called Addis Abba and it was DELICIOUS.  I've gone to one in GR before and this was very similar.  My favorite was the cabbage one.  They had some spicy ones that were really good but they had some heat... I'm sissy. But the flavor was sooo good.  We had some meat too that was really good as well.  It was a nice meal because it's communal (you use the bread they give you and use that as utensils instead of typical knife and fork) and you just dig in!  It's nice because you have a sampling and you can talk with your company.  Overall, great experience.  And I feel like if you have a lot of time to spend you could just eat and eat and eat.  It was kinda like sushi where if you stayed long enough you'd digest it quickly I bet that you could be there all day long!  We joked that the bread kinda looked like a sham wow, and we even rolled it up, twisted it (like we were drying it) and rung it back out and it kept its integrity pretty well :)  haha.

Our yummy food!  We ended up rotating so the red (more spicy) stuff was towards them.  They brought yummy meat to put in the middle too, but I was so anxious to dig in!

After the delicious meal we went and hung out with a few other friends at their place.  Since I hadn't seen Tally and Pipi's place since they moved out there it was nice to see how they've been settling in.  We just hung out and talked about whatever... zombie apocalypse really.  Interesting stuff...

It was getting pretty late and Ratty had to wake up at an unreasonably early time (to get her miles in before her big day of filming) so she went to bed pretty soon after we got back to their house, but Gato and I stayed up, had some delicious wine and were inappropriate together.  Ahh... just like the good ole days ;)  Well, that sounds bad... we had a good time just hanging out, laughing... some serious, some not.  I miss it.  Unfortunately I do live 2 hours away so around 1:30 I decided it was time to get my bunda home.  So, I made the trek home safely and was very happy to get into bed.

Its still hard not having them around the corner (literally) but it does make the visits all the more better.  We will see what the next few years hold for us, location wise, but I know where ever we end up we will be by friends.  :)

JVG

Quebra and Dizzy

This past weekend my parents were out of town, so that meant no pizza and beer night.  That also meant that our Sunday was freed up too... shocker... all this free time!  What to do?  Well, we were lucky enough that our friends Quebra and Dizzy were free to hang out.  :)

Tristan adores hanging out with them. Maybe because Quebra is fun sized and Dizzy is a big kid and is super goofy with him, but nevertheless, he loves them.  He talks about them all the time.  So, he was SUPER excited to find out that we were going to see them.  To him, I think that his Saturday was perfect.  We went to the children's museum first, and then when it closed we went out for Sushi with them and then hung out at their place.  Sushi is one of Dude's favorite foods and I'm pretty sure he horked down an entire California roll (minus 2 pieces because Lucy had those), a bowl of miso soup, and two bowls of fried rice.  He knows good food when he sees it :)

Goose checking out the outside world

The big bubble bin

Then we went back to their place and just hung out and the kids were being silly.  I'm glad that things can be so chill with them, and it's always such a good time.  We talk about things, some serious, some not and I'm never worried that something weird is going to happen (out of the norm anyways haha).  Gaetan and I always joke about buying a lot of land and then relocating all our favorite couples to that land and building houses so we have our own little community  :)  We definitely have a list already... it would be amazing if it could happen!

Dude being silly/extremely flexible on their couch

This photo courtesy of Dude

You know he's played hard and had a great time when he passes out in the car on the way home.

But, we had a great time with them (as always) and looking forward to hanging out with them again.

JVG

The out-laws

OK.  This post is pretty much for me and getting my frustrations out.  My good friend Amy's husband, Brian (whom I call The Big B... who isn't large at all) coined this phrase, 'the out laws'.  Describing your in-laws that you can't really stand or drive you crazy.  So, I would say that I am more than within my limits to say I have out-laws.

Since Wilfreda's last visit we have kept our communication as minimal as possible.  It might sound mean and one might even venture to think, well you should just talk to her about it... and the answer to that is.  We have.  Repeatedly.  And the outcome is always the same.  She doesn't listen and does what she wants anyways.  Ridiculous.  Anyways, Oma Oma (Gaetan's Grandma) is coming from Belgium for a visit (like she does every year) and we decided that we would bite the bullet and have to see her then.  She texts every once and awhile, and calls poor Gaetan more than she calls me now. And lately, the newest fiasco is Zoe and her decision on whether she should pursue dance at school or take this job as an office manager at this company.

Zoe keeps calling and asking for advice and every time she calls she has changed her mind on what she's going to do from the previous time she's called (which is usually the day before).  And then we get Wilfreda texting us information we already know, because I think she thinks she's the only person that Zoe talks too... Well, finally, Zoe has decided that she's going to pursue her dance school in Seattle.  Final Answer.  She did her job training at this company but couldn't find her green card, so she decided that was probably a sign, since she needs that to actually get hired.  Good, I'm glad she's made up her mind.

However, we keep getting texts from Wilfreda saying shit we already know, and then trying to sound all philosophical and deep with things that are just plain stupid.  And then really, this is about the Dad too.  Now, I've only met this man three times in my life, so that probably equals a whole 2 hours.  Zoe was all afraid of moving away because she didn't know how she was going to handle being away from him.  I was like, seriously?!  This man has shit all over you, and your family so many times I can't even keep it straight and you're worried about not being by him?  I'm pretty sure he didn't give a flying eff when he moved out of the country and out of state without telling her crap about where he was or how long he was going to gone.  I asked her why she was so invested and she said that even though through the good times and the bad he's always been there for her and understands her.  Yeah, ok.  I'm sure he understands people because he needs to know how they operate in order to manipulate them.  He was all against her going and was trying his hardest to make her feel badly for wanting to go.  WHAT KIND OF FATHER DOES THAT?  She even said that he's more like a friend than a father, which is messed up already.  Yes, once you get to a certain age your parents are not really your 'parents' because you're both adults and they're more like peers... but lets get one thing straight.  Neither one of those people (Ingrid or Mark) were ever parents to begin with.

It just blows my mind every time she does this because we have such good talks and it really seems like she's getting a handle on life and then she pulls this weird crap.  I understand that it's hard to distance yourself from people whom you think mean well, and are your 'family' but I have got to think that you can only be stepped on so many times before you say, "Eff you."  Ya know?  I guess she hasn't figured that one out yet.

I think Zoe is so desperate to have something that is close to a normal 'family' that she is willing to keep ties with people she should've definitely cut loose long ago.  And I think that in some ways its easier to keep them around because it would be hard to cut them loose and feel vulnerable and alone.  The only thing that I can really do, is offer help and guidance when asked and be there for her when they crap on her time and time again.  I guess that's the part that's really frustrates me.  That she is so surprised and hurt that it's happened again.  It seems like she has such an understanding of what she wants, and how she is going to get it when we talk, but I think as soon as she talks with the other two she reverts right back to being 8 years old... about the age she was when they really started dumping on both kids.  Its hard to get over that idea of 'family' as the people who are biologically related to you.  There are plenty of people in our lives that I would consider family before people that are related to me by blood.  And that is a hard concept to make your own too.

But, regardless of his trying to convince her to stay around she is going to Cornish to pursue dancing.  I'm not looking forward to the drama that will ensue but hopefully we can be more help than not.  Its just difficult because Zoe turns to us for help but then runs to Ingrid and Mark, who give her terrible advice, and she just falls all over that like it's the best thing she's ever heard.  In some aspects she's super mature for her age, but in trusting people and judging their character, I think she is as green as they come.

Ingrid has all these grand plans for when Oma Oma comes to town for the family to get together... and since Zoe is moving out to Seattle in the next two weeks she wants to cram everything all together at once.  Her big yank is that she wants to be around for Tristan's birthday, and we weren't planning on doing something big at all, because we aren't really that big about things like that. So, we will see how this all plays out.  Pray for us.  Pray for patience.  Pray for understanding, and grace and peace.  I'll let you know how it all unfolds...

JVG

Getting my Asian on

Gaetan and I have been talking pretty seriously lately about when we think we should start the adoption process.  We both agreed that we will probably start in about a year (when he's done with classes) and then see how it goes.  Another thing that we are feeling really at peace about is how many we want to adopt.  Originally we had discussed that we would like a child around 6-12 months old.  That way they are nursing anymore, but they are still young enough that they haven't formed too many habits.  But the more and more we've talked the more and more we're thinking that we will adopt siblings.  Yup, two of them.  Which, ultimately means they will most likely be a little older.  When my brother and I were adopted he was 4 and I was 2.  I look at Tristan (who will be 3 next month already!) and can't even fathom missing out on all this stuff in his life, and still a whole nother year after that!  But, I am confident that whatever children are placed in our lives we will be more than happy to have them, and God will give us the wisdom on what to do.  :)

With that said, and watching my friends go through the adoption process (in Kenya), attending a tradition Korean first birthday, and thinking about my future and furthering my education, we talked about me taking Korean classes.  It was such a shocker being around all those Korean people who spoke Korean as their first language, and not having a stinking clue on what they were talking about.  I would LOVE to be able to speak it and teach the kids it as well.  I've been looking into places that offer it, and I think that U of M would be the best and closest.  A lot of places have Korean/asian studies majors, but not the actual language.  The thought of going back to school is exciting... and I'm definitely not going to major in it, but I would like to, hopefully one day, be fluent.

I would say I'm confident in who I am as a person, be that an American or Korean... but there is so much more about my heritage that I wish I had knowledge about... and thinking about adopting two ones from there I would want to have the best understanding about their lives to help with their transition.  So, we will see what the next few years hold in store for us and Korea!  Also, part of the adopting criteria is they want the parents to travel to Korea for at least a week, and I would love to not be out of my element (as much as can be helped).  :)

JVG

Moving

So, we are actually moving after our fiasco with all the other housing places that we tried before this... and actually, this is the best find yet.  I know it probably sounds like I'm just saying that... but this one is bigger than the rest, and for a better price!  :)

We are still waiting to hear which 3 bedroom place it is.  There was a duplex available that had a garage and was slightly bigger... and available sooner.  And then there is another 3 bedroom place that will be coming available at the beginning of August (so not to far away).  The lady was supposed to call on Thursday to let us know but she didn't... :(  And then I knew that she was going to be in training on Friday, so we didn't expect to hear anything from her then.  So, hopefully (crossing fingers) we will be finding out tomorrow and enlisting the help of our friends to make this move (and hopefully last for awhile) quick and painless.

Dude is really excited because they have three playgrounds at this new complex, and one of them looks like a dragon/dinosaur.  I think Lucy is pretty indifferent, but she will have her own room.  We were debating on whether they should share a room and have an spare, but I know that she sleeps better (which ultimately means I sleep better) if she's as sequestered as possible.  When they get older I think they will share a room (probably even want to for a little bit) which will be good.

I will keep everybody updated on what we are doing for moving, but it is such a relief to know that we found a place and are very excited about it.  :)

JVG

Capo n Cars

Ever since I've stopped running (because it's been WAY to hot to be doing anything like that) I have become restless and realized I have a lot of time on my hands now (at night).  So, I decided that it was time to start capo back up again.  Yes, yes, I know that this is also an intense about of being active outside, but I've missed it during my brief hiatus.  OK, so it wasn't that brief, but you get the picture.

Since moving down here last Nov. we always talked about going to Show's class... even got permission to train with their group, but with the transition and trying to figure out our schedule with Gaetan's classes and stuff we never got around to it.  He trains outside during the summer, which is CRAZY hot out.  I never once had to use my inhaler during my marathon training, but there is just something about the hot and humid that my lungs can't handle.

I've enjoyed his classes a lot.  They are pretty intense... and I'm sure taking about a year and a half off doesn't help, but I'm getting back into it.  I think that I'm finally at the point where I'm not super sore the next day... or the few after that.  Its fun to train with different people and get used to their movements and how they play.

Cabecao and I doing a little dance haha

We had a fun, lively friendly game

It looks a lot worse then it was

It's been nice also because Show's kid is there and Boneca's two children come too, and Tristan is finally getting used to the idea of playing with other kids.  The last time there they had a blast together.  They did a lot of side walk chalk together, and one of them had a toy car... after Tristan saw/played with that he was in heaven.  So, we ended up getting him his very own a few days later.  I think the fascination with little toy cars has just hit and I am already trying to figure out a way to organize all those little cars that are bound to be all over the house.  :)

Dude playing with the kids

Lucy actually playing with chalk and not eating it

She loved running back and forth through this bike rack

Duder and his new red car

JVG

Gardening

One of the things that I love about going to my parents house on the weekends is their garden.  I am so excited (and looking forward) to the day that I can have my own mini garden!  I'm pretty terrible at keeping house plants alive... so I'm sure there will be a learning curve, but I'm excited about it.  I'm excited about the idea of planting, watching something grow, and then having food grown locally and that I know how it's been cultivated.  Now, I'm not going to get on my high horse and say that people should eat only organic or any of that jazz, because well 1.) it's expensive and 2.) I love me some Big Macs every now and again.

BUT not only do I love the freshness of the food and satisfaction of being able to use what you worked so hard to do, but the time that you can spend with loved one while doing it.  Usually after dinner the kids like to run around (nakey of course) outside.  That's about the time that Grandpa and Grandma go water the garden, weed (if need be) and then pick anything that needs to be eaten!  Lucy is all about playing in water, and Dude likes to fill this bucket up and then have his little toy watering can and water the flowers.

Sprinkler time

Dude 'watering' himself after they got done wedding

Its so nice seeing them enjoy nature and being content with simple things.  Not having to be glued to the front of a TV, but really being able to enjoy themselves outside.  I know a big part of it is hanging out with Grandpa Don and being able to play in dirt, but, I'll take it.  :)  The learning about plants and how things work are priceless too.  I love sitting on the deck, laughing with the kids, pointing out bugs, and being with family.  This is what it's all about for me.

Playing animals inside with Grandpa Don

Now that it's getting farther into the summer their stuff is actually getting ready to be picked.  So after our glorious beach day Tristan helped Grandpa pick fresh green beans for us to take home!  He, and Lucy, of course, enjoyed a few fresh off the plant but that is something I'm not going to object to.  "No kids!  Don't eat fresh vegetables while you're playing outside!"  haha.

Goose enjoying the fruit of Dude's labor

He was so proud of his beans

I want the kids to have an appreciation for family time like this, and for nature/creation that is so simply beautiful.  Also, not to be afraid of creepy crawlies :)

JVG

Beach Day

This week my Dad had the week off because they are remodeling one of their rooms in their house.  They finished early (and it looks really nice!) so we got to go to the beach with him.  My Dad pretty much knows all the little areas in Michigan, and any back road to get anywhere.  It's amazing really.  If I'm ever lost I just call him and give a general description of where I am, and he knows right where I am and how to get out.  

We decided to go to the beach with him.  He wanted to try out this beach in Saugatuk, because the beaches at Holland or Grand Haven would've been obnoxiously busy... and I can say, that I'm really pleased with this beach!  It's a state run beach so our little passport on our license plates get us in for free!  They have a ton of places to hike and a lot of trails in some really beautiful woods.  On the beach they have a ton of dunes that you can climb and about 3 miles of coast to choose from.  We put Goose in the backpack and Dude walked most of the way there.  The water was extremely cold, but clear :)  My crazy Dad thought it wasn't cold at all and just went straight in... I couldn't believe it!  He's so skinny that one would think for sure the temperature would affect him, but apparently not.

Pure Michigan

Dude thought that the water was really cold, so he stayed by the shore.  The nice thing about this beach was it didn't get deep until really far out.  It had a nice little sand bar once it would've been probably about waist high on Dude.  It was kinda nice that the water was so cold because then it was easier to watch the kids, because they weren't going to be running into the water unexpectedly!  haha.

We just took the day and played in the sand.  Very lazy day.  Gaetan dug this huge hole for the kids to play in some water... this water was really warm, and if it wasn't warm then it heated up quickly :)  There were parts of it that was about waist deep for Lucy so she was about it.  She wasn't quite sure about the whole thing when we first got there, but then she got into it after she saw everybody playing in the sand.

Goose playing in the hole we started digging, which eventually connected to Gaetan's big pool.  She liked putting the sand back into the water.  haha

Sand castle that was already there, that we elaborated upon.

It was a beautiful day.  Not crowded at all.  Quiet.  There was a glorious breeze coming in, and it was just hot enough to enjoy being on the beach, and if you really wanted to you could freeze a bit in the water :)  The kids enjoyed looking for rocks in the shallow water, and we ended up walking a little up and down the shore.  Then, Dude and Gaetan wrote in the sand... some of his favorite words :)

Grandpa Don hanging out with Dude.  Dude wanted to go out in the water but not actually in the water haha

Lucy 'testing' the waters with Grandpa's help.  :)

After Goose decided that she had had enough of the beach (we were probably there for about 4 hours) we hiked back to the car and had a yummy cook out at my parents.  Those kids were pooped by the end of the night.  It was a lot of fun and I'm glad that we could just hang out with my Dad.  I know that Tristan loves spending time with Grandpa Don, and I'm glad they could make those memories together.

JVG