In a funk

I remember this being a hard time of year when I was in college because its the longest stretch of the year where there aren't any breaks.  You get burned out and there really isn't a break until Thanksgiving... we are there as a family right now.  G has been at the grindstone with school... especially with Nervous Guy and there isn't any reprieve.  That's another subject.  Nervous Guy.  He is somebody who asked for tutoring at the beginning of the semester and usually when people as for help they want one *maybe* two hours a week... this guy has been doing 10!!  The last two weeks he's cut back to 5 but for a class that meets for 4 hours a week that's pretty intense.  What class is it he wants all this help you ask?  Physics 1... the weeder course for pre-meds.  Don't get me wrong, we like having some extra cash, but he's a bit of a chore to tutor.  He frequently cries and tells himself that he can do it. Admittedly I felt like crying quite often when doing physics but I held my shit together... at least in front of people!  haha.  Anyhoo, even though G has one class this semester he has been gone more than ever, which means I'm finally getting a taste of what it's like to have three small kids by myself!  haha.

During the past couple of weeks Norah hasn't been sleeping very well... I know that it's her teeth and that she wishes she was sleeping too, but oh man, I. Am. Tired.  And then having G gone means I don't get my usual catch up, so things have been testy.  I can feel myself losing my patience more... and the kids have been not fantastic either.  Bad combo.  I know that I'm a good Momma but at the end of the day when I collapse in bed the last thought before I pass out is, 'tomorrow, I'll be a good Momma.'  It wears on your psyche.

I have been in this funk and didn't know how to shake it.  I ended up staying up WAY late one night just because I was soaking up all the silence.  I like people but I definitely need my quiet and alone time to recharge.  In my funk I honestly felt like I wasn't going to make it... that it was such a chore to get up and do normal routines things and I just wish I could mentally check out.  Luckily it has run its course and I am feeling much better.  It did help that we got to see some out of friends from out of town and that Norah has returned to a much better sleeping pattern.  Other factors have seemed to be working themselves out that were causing stress as well, so I think we are on the up swing.  Thank God.

JVG