Today Ingrid came for a visit, but really, we got Wilfreda instead. The last visit was so good and so promising, but this visit was right back to the same old shit we are accustomed too. She wanted to come earlier in the morning and we told her that was fine but the kids were going to have to go down for naps. Well, the kids did, and then we were left there with her not really knowing what to do. If we would've gotten Ingrid instead of Wilfreda it wouldn't have been an issue, but she was right back at being everything that we pretty much hate.
I knew we had to have some sort of activity to do to keep us all busy, or else I'd kill her by the end of the hour. We decided to go to a water park which was a lot of fun, and I'll tell you about that later.
It really started with the 'texting'. She was texting with Zoe and her ring was on high volume, which was annoying but it was worse... she had it programmed to read the text messages outloud to her in the most obnoxious voice ever. Then, as she was rudely answering her text messages and ignoring everybody there she would say what she was texting as she did it... slowly and painfully because she isn't the world's fastest typer. After awhile we finally asked her to at least turn her ringer down so that it wasn't going off every two seconds. Seriously. How. Rude.
The hardest part about her visits is when she tries to give parenting advice. Not to just me, but to parents in general... and I by no means think I should be winning the parent of the year award, but it's just kinda ironic that she would give up so much advice about something she knows nothing about. Yes, she is a Mother, but no, she absolutely did not do any mothering. The annoyance started with her telling us all the things that she's been doing around the house... things I kinda figured everybody who owned a home did. Like vaccuuming... doing dishes, gardening (since they have a garden) and she was so proud that she made something from scratch. Food that is. She was also really excited about getting a new microwave because she then made it seem like they could cook food... right. And then this statement came, "Can you imagine what it would be like to not see your children for 14 days, and send them away with strangers... people you don't even know?" Usually when she says something like that she has some story that she's heard on the news, or some parent of the kids that she does PT with tells her.. but no, what does she say next? "Because that's what I did with Gaetan and Zoe. Even at this age" Referring to how old Tristan and Lucy are now. SERIOUSLY?! Are you kidding me? It's like she's almost proud of all the eff ups she's done. I kinda just stared at her in disbelief... and was glad for the distraction of one of the kids before I said something snarky. Then she said that she would advice against it, and I told her that even if she told me that it was a great idea I wouldn't do it. I just plain. don't. understand.
At the water park what does she come out wearing? A pretty skimpy bikini... yes, we know that she's petite, and I don't even mind bikinis... when I'm by myself, not in public. I don't know... I just don't think that its very appropriate for her to be wearing that, maybe I'm a prude. Well, it gets worse... because it was so skimpy her top didn't really cover like it should've and she made our PG water park date into something rated R. Gross.
After the water park we went out to dinner and I missed a call from Zoe. She was calling to let me know how her admissions to Cornish (This fine arts college in Seattle) is going. She was really excited because all of her paper work got sent in and she just has a few finishing touches. I can empathize of what a relief it is when you know that all your stuff is in (because that means other people were responsible). So she ended up calling Ingrid/Wilfreda instead so we got to hear that story about 6 times in the span of 15 minutes. Eventually, when she started up with it again I hinted that we already knew that she was so proud of her and that we were happy for her too. She didn't get the hint. Gaetan actually had to spell out the fact that she had already told us half a dozen times before. It gets better.
The part that annoyed me about the whole thing about Zoe is she treats Zoe like she's still 14... which happens to be the age that Zoe moved out. She kept going on and on about how proud of her she is that she could do this on her own (like she hasn't been living her life on her own without guidance since 14) and when we tried to tell her that we understand because we went through the same application process she pretty much told us that we didn't. That we couldn't understand what it would be like because Zoe is the only person that could get through this process... ugh. It's like she's trying to play her up for everything she does but at the same time she is cutting her down because her expectations of her are so low that it MUST be a miracle that she can put one foot in front of the other while breathing.
Again, she never tells Gaetan that he does a good job at getting through college and applying all by himself. I'm not exactly sure why she does the things that she does, or says the things that she says, but when I called her out on it she got really pissy really fast. She stopped looking at me for the rest of the meal and wouldn't acknowledge me unless it dealt specifically with one of the kids. It's like she is the only one that can be happy for Zoe or understand what it must be like.
I'm gonna say that its probably going to be Aug the next time we see her. That's when Oma Oma is in town and we would love to see Oma Oma. She tells us stories about her past and growing up and life with Oma Oma and I don't know what to believe because her view of reality is so twisted... so its nice hearing it from Oma Oma herself. She has even told Ingrid before that that's not how it happened or that it wasn't true. Interesting.
Well, the kids are asleep and I am looking forward to some hanging out with Gaetan. We survived a brush with Wilfreda... Lord helped us.
JVG
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